I understand!!

 So I understand has been around for a long time. It is a corporate jargon which is very similar to say 'Sorry'. When I first heard the usage of this phrase, I found it slightly ironic.

It often used in different ways. Sometimes its used as it is.. for example when someone approaches me or anyone, and relates something that really troubling them and I am stumped. Stumped not because I don't have a response, but because I don't know what is the correct response. So I say, " I understand." Hmm kind of gives it an added flavor in written chat language.

Sometimes I understand can also actually mean I really do understand unless it is quintessentially followed by a but, or a for instance or an advice or something even remotely closer to that.

You see ' I understand' in today's world is the go to phrase for all situations. A person is grieving someone's or something's loss, I understand; confronted with a difficult situation - I understand; confused about one's own emotion 'I understand'.

I mean how can you possibly understand. No one can truly understand another situation even if they have been in same situation earlier. Everything changes.

But, but, but.. having said that, it is also one of the most powerful phrases. Did I just counter myself!! Well may be just a little. You see in my experience of using this phrase, I have often also come across the impact it makes.

People's biggest complaint now a days is the lack of understanding they get from their surroundings. Sometimes people just want to be heard without judgments and 'I understand' is the best phrase used in those situations. I understand also comes in handy when it is used without connotation, so for example if a friend or a colleague is worried about loosing their jobs, and comes and confides in you, give them a hearing and if you don't know what to say, 'I understand' works fine. and if you don't then say that 'I can only imagine'. The trick is to know when to stop. Sometimes in our attempt or desperation to assist we defeat the purpose of the communication. Halfway through the conversation, we start looking for possible responses in our heads. The minute we start doing that, is the time we loose the essence of 'I understand.'

Another situation is when you have given them a compassionate listening and a vehement, ‘I understand’ and they still look at you as if you have committed a crime, then you go back and ask them, ‘ is there something that you expect from me?’ The response to this question can help you figure out your next course of action. But till then, my advice is to stay put.

See its quite simple 'I understand' to be truly effective should actually display and acknowledge that the person in front of you telling you their life story, so to say; has actually been understood.

So truly try and Understand..